Friday, June 29, 2012

HappySadHappySadANGRYANGRYHappySad

This week I crossed the line for real. I am no longer merely moody. I am unstable. The Mayor of Crazytown.

During unoccupied-body months, I have some pretty high highs and very low lows. Spill a big ol' cocktail of baby-growing hormones on my emotional state and the result is a super-powered mess. Over the course of a single day I'm about six different people. Fortunately, a couple of them are the upbeat, productive types. The rest just want to cry and throw things. And maybe set fire to something with their minds.

There's no telling who will show up to work at what time. At least they change shifts often.

Mood swings are par for the pregnancy course. Of course they are. Even if hormones weren't at the core of the whole process, changing the shape (and color and temperature and texture) of my body/mind self, the emotional impact of creating another human life would still be huge. There is a brand new person where there was never a person before! And she's wiggling her not-quite-finished body, and batting her fist against my cervix so I have to stop walking for a minute because suddenly I'm getting a Pap smear from the inside.

Surreal, but very real.

Of course I want to cry and throw things. Except that I also want to explode with joy.

Belly Feet

.....................................

4 comments:

Allison the Meep said...

Fetuses: The Creators of Crazy

Sara said...

What Allison said. Crazy town.

Cait said...

Mood swings suck monkey balls. Hope you get some moments of calm in soon.

Anonymous said...

love this!!