3.5

Dear Westley,

First let me apologize for yelling at you on your half-birthday. I know I apologized twice already, but I still feel awful about it. I was already upset about something else entirely. Also, I tend to be emotionally fragile around cake. In any case, none of that had anything to do with you. I'm so sorry.

I was so glad you liked the cake (especially after all the drama). When you asked me for a "donut-cookie cake" I thought I was screwed. Little did I know that vanilla cake plus a little nutmeg, topped with Mighty O donuts vegan peanut-butter chocolate chip cookie halves would be such a hit.

I think it's beyond awesome that you're three and a half now, and I'm astonished at how quickly you seem to be growing these past couple of weeks. I say this all the time, at every stage, but you look so much like a Little Boy these days, all grown up and ready for preschool in the fall.

This was you three years ago:

And now, here you are, telling me what letter things start with, snapping photos, singing entire songs, making up stories about your imaginary, built-by-you robot friends. I cannot wait for you to have a real friend—a boy or girl your own age—because I think you'll be a great friend. As soon as you figure out that playing with other people can be cool and fun.

I have to admit to being not so fond of your attitude towards other children. I get that it's hard to share the entire world with other people who you may or may not like the looks of, but that's how life is. And some of those people (even the ones you may not like the looks of) are actually pretty rad. I wish I could help you see this, but I know you have to figure it out on your own.

I am, however, extremely fond of your interest in the world around those other people. I love seeing you figure something out all on your own—a few days ago, you showed me how one of the computer games at the library works. You want to touch and manipulate and experience. Your favorite thing right now is on/off buttons: action, power, and instant gratification, all rolled into one. You're the picture of sweet and dear when it comes to your four grandparents. And you love love. You took a picture of Daddy and me kissing today.

Waking up to find you cuddling with Daddy never fails to melt my heart into a gooey mess, and I cherish the way you cozy up to me, wrapping your arms around me and squishing your little body into mine. Nothing can be bad then.

You're the coolest little guy I've ever met. Let's hang out a bunch, okay?

Love, love, love,

Mommy

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